Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Randomize
