please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize