it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
You did what with his pubic hair?
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