winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Randomize
