jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
