Are we in a gay sports bar?
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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