"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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