I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize