did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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