I smell stomach acid.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
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