i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
