apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
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