Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
