well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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