He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
please don't call me when you're wasted. i don't feel like having any other future arguments at 3:18am about how to hang up your phone. you have a flip phone, you should know regardless of how fucked up you are.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
Randomize
