he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Randomize
