great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Randomize
