That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
