Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Randomize
