Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize
