Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
