I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
