she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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