I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Randomize