Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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