Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
