You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Randomize
