Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
