Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
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