it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
