are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
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So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
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I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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