I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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