is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize