After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
