found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize