he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
