physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
