It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
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