Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
