I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
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