Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
