question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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