Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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