the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Randomize