I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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