On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
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He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
True college students do jello shots in the library
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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