I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
