whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
