i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
