There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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