I'm drive I can fine osifer
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
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We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
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MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
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